I would surrender the rest of my life for just one week without pain or feebleness. This is the wish of a feeble, childish and selfish mind.
I should not post this. I should not endanger anyone with the slightest possibility of reading this. But my various essential measurements of health have been so unstable, so unmanageable, I have just enough ego left that I don't want to obliterate what may be my last stupid thoughts.
No I am not suicidal. I don't need to be. The Reaper is coming for me on multiple fronts. The only gift he offers is an end to this pain.